3 Ways We Deceive Ourselves

Lying is a pretty negative thing, but doing it to ourselves is even worse. We put a blindfold over our eyes on our  own, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Today we will discover 3 ways in which we deceive ourselves in order to put an end to them.

1. Believe that we can solve our problems alone

Surely some of the following phrases sound familiar to us: “I can handle this alone”, “I’ve been through worse things”, “I don’t want to upset anyone”, “it’s not really that serious”.

We all go through bad times. However, believing that we can solve any problem that we have to face alone  is one of the ways in which we deceive ourselves.

Let’s take some examples like someone who has problems in their relationship or who is always sad or who has stopped doing many things that they liked and feels a great lack of motivation.

Unknowingly, we may be dealing with a case of a toxic relationship or depression. However, instead of asking for help, we hope that we can fix this ourselves.

Psychologists’ offices are filled every day with people who have been suffering for months. Maybe it’s pride, maybe shame, or maybe this terrible belief.

You don’t have to be sunk, shattered, and broken to ask for help. Needing others to solve our problems is not something we should be ashamed of. We all, at some point, require a hand to lift us from the ground where we find ourselves broken.

2. Confusing need with desire

This is a serious problem and another of the ways in which we deceive ourselves. Because in many areas of our life we ​​are unable to discern between what is need and what is desire.

We delude ourselves by thinking that we need that coat we see in a store. We don’t really need it: we want it. However, confusion causes us to misinvest our money.

The same happens in couple relationships. Sometimes, we do not need to continue with that relationship that hurts us, that does not satisfy us or in which we are with someone that we do not really like.

However, our desire not to look bad in front of others, so that they do not tell us that we have not given everything for the relationship or, simply, because of the desire not to be alone, we remain there, in that relationship, harmful and destructive .

To eliminate this second of the ways in which we deceive ourselves, it is important to know how to connect with our interior and discern between what we need or want.

The need, as we are dealing with it in this case, can be seen as that intuition that guides us to know if we need to leave a place, change jobs or leave a relationship (be careful not to enter it).

3. Thinking that we can’t

The third and final way we deceive ourselves is to believe in the possibility that we cannot achieve something. Whether it’s a job, getting out of a toxic relationship, or changing jobs.

To think that we cannot do something is to limit ourselves and, in most cases, this is the result of insecurities and low self-esteem.

If our parents have given us negative reinforcement during childhood, if we have lived experiences in which we have not felt approved, it is possible that this now manifests itself in this way of self-deception.

Actually, it’s not that we can’t, it’s that we think we can’t. Perhaps because we compare ourselves to others or because we do not feel worthy of what we could achieve.

However, the great truth is that we have no limits. These are only imposed by us. Do you know another of the ways in which we deceive ourselves? If you have detected that you are deceiving yourself but in another way, go ahead and share it with us.

These are just 3 ways we deceive ourselves, the ones we consider the most frequent and most limiting. Starting a process to increase self-esteem will be very important to prevent them from continuing to control our life.